There's a lot of hurt going on here. I have this friend who recently helped me see how things can go to shit in an instant. She did this by taking this beautiful relationship, this friendship we've shared for some years, and crushing it. To be fair, she did what she did because she was hurting, and I suspect in part because of outside influences on her state of emotional health. She's been through a lot.
So I spent a few days in intense meditation. Not sitting for three days straight or anything, of course, but twenty minutes here, an hour there, for about three days. I didn't get much sleep but I did read a lot of Chogyam Trungpa, Lama Surya Das and Pema Chodron, and I've come to the following realizations.
First of all, nothing has actually fallen apart. Nothing has gone to shit, as I thought. This was simply my overreaction to my own misperceptions about virtually everything involved. My understanding of what was going on was completely clouded over, because my own attachment to that relationship wouldn't let me see that the whole thing was an illusion anyway. In fact, the illusion itself was a construct of my attachment.
Once all the dust settles, my friend and I will still be friends (I hope). We'll at least still know each other and will be able to start rebuilding whatever we had before, and we will both have learned something from the experience. It's not going to be easy, and I've made it more difficult than it needed to be by acting out of those hurtful emotions that always go along with episodes like this. But this kind of healing -- this kind of understanding -- is what comes from knowing where to turn when you're hurting; whose teaching to read, which voice to listen to. In my case, these teachers helped me pull myself out of this abyss of despair, and pretty quickly - although it still hurts, it doesn't look like it did a few nights ago.
Next time things fall apart for you, I recommend asking your teachers about it. Even if they don't know they're your teachers.